Archive | December, 2018

The FULL Equation Envelops Two Weeks Of Grieving & Introspection


We are just minutes away from it being two weeks since Peaches passed over and just now, 41  left Andrews AFB for Houston.


This poignant picture of Sully mourning his Human as I mourn Peaches shows both side of the equation. Human/Canine bonds can be the purest we have. Unquestioning Love and Devotion.

For me it has been two weeks of deep grieving and introspection. I grieved for my faithful Companion, Peaches, and for a time when we were a kinder and gentler nation.  I acknowledge my own mortality – something I first recognized when I survived cancer 35 years ago. Interesting that I didn’t recognize it when I escaped becoming a name on the Vietnam Memorial Wall! It was only after surviving cancer that I brought those two escapes together, adding another in 1998, as indications that I still had things to accomplish in this Life’s Journey.  Have I ???

While assessing my life in detail and fully acknowledging that I am far from perfect, I HOPE SO. There will be no large crowds gathering to acknowledge and list any possible good that I may have been responsible for when I pass. I can not personally do a FULL self review until I am on the Other Side and reviewing this Life so I can plan and prepare for the next.

As an Educator of older Emotionally Disabled Students, As a Counselor, As an Adoptive Father of Older Children, As a Manager/Boss, As a Friend, I hope I have contributed some lasting good. Good that is pure as I will never hear or know about it.  I do not include Husband, as that is an area I have not excelled at.

I have always known, and during this two weeks of reflection it has become clearer, that I am a person who needs to be creating – creating takes many forms and has throughout my life. Sometimes it is safe environments, sometimes physical construction of buildings, stores or rooms. I can visualize in 3D and always have been able to do this, I can mentally see, clearly and in detail, what I may want to create. At times it has been the blueprint that those helping me have followed without knowing where we are going until it all comes together and they see the finished product. I learned recently from a special friend that this visualization ability is connected to dyslexia. Challenges come with benefits:)

Looking forward with a creative vision took a hit when Peaches passed. She had become my purpose, after a horrible year with RA, and loving and caring for her gave me purpose again! Then Cannabis took away the horrible, debilitating RA pain! Making life good again.  Then Peaches passed. I guess she considered her mission accomplished.


I am left to walk on!

These two weeks have helped me redirect. I have worked through the numb void and realize what the next steps are. At this point in life, I do not know how much time I have left. I know that I need to be looking forward and creating.  Two weeks of deep morning and introspection have set my next course.

I have visualized how to downsize within our house and create a home that can allow me to continue aging as I host friends in a welcoming space. I know how to bring my books into this reduced area – this  VISUALIZATION came to me last night! There will be book cases in all rooms other than the dining room (OF COURSE) and the front hall will become book lined – including all the way up the staircase:):)  At 70, with the minor infirmities that life has gifted me so far, I will need to hire some help for the staircase installation – something I would once have done myself. Most of the rest I can still do with some help from Tom.

There will be a bedroom off the dining room that can be a guest room until the day arrives that I need to sleep on the first level – Then our room upstairs can be a guest room. If I live long enough there are two other second floor bedrooms that can be guest rooms.

Energized and ready to create.

The other thing that has come out of these two weeks is my acknowledging that I do want to visit England & Scotland while I am still able. This will take some careful planning, if it is to be. Time will tell on this. I need to renew my lapsed passport!


Thank you Peaches for joining me in life as I came through the RA pain and needed a higher purpose. Loving you and making sure your, all too short, time with us was the best possible.

Peaches  Peaches

We both loved deeply and purely and we both benefited.

Thank you Peaches for Loving me and being such a Special Friend!


It Is Time To Notify The Fayrehale Community ——

Peaches at Lucy MacKenzie

July 25, 2006 – November 21, 2018

Peaches Was Part of Our Family From
April 20, 2018 – November 21, 2018.

She passed over The Rainbow Bridge at 3pm, in my arms with me loving her, petting her and talking to her. It was very peaceful as her beautiful, clear, deep eyes, which were looking at me, turned cloudy when her Energy left and she was gone.

She will spend one last night “sleeping” with us and then be wrapped in gold, raw silk for a Spring burial.

Now she is frolicking on the other side with all three Abigails:), Heidi, Gretchen and Portia as they wait to greet me en masse one day in the future.

Our time together was all too brief. Peaches brought so much JOY to so many. Not just the Friends who followed her here but to THOUSANDS of total strangers, often hundreds a day, as we were out and about.

She will be REMEMBERED and MISSED!

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.

(mary elizabeth frye – 1932)

Cancer:(  We were fortunate in the fact that the first signs were just 4 days before Peaches passed. I thought she had congestive heart failure when I took her to the Vet. Xrays showed that she was riddled with cancer. An egg size tumor in her stomach and smaller tumors (plural) in kidneys and lungs.

Her time with us was all too short! 7 months and 1 day but I kept my promise to her and she was loved and well cared for “for whatever time she had left”.  The void she leaves is enormous.

It won’t surprise any of you that Peaches leaves behind OVER 5000 pictures:):):)

She may be the most photographed and best known Adopted Senior Canine ever!!!!

The First Picture is the day before she passed when she had that pre-passing surge and came up to give me our regular morning greeting which involved lots of kisses (face and head washing)

The Second Picture is just 5 days before she passed.

The Third Picture is one of my favorites.

The Fourth Picture is a summer lunch visit with Aunt Gretchen Greer.

The Fifth Picture was taken by Gretchen on the Day we met! Little knowing how glorious our time together would be ……. or how brief.

I hope all the pictures will help as I work to adjust to the void Peaches left. Noticeable at every point in the day!




Peaches LOVED riding in the van and went with me every time I went somewhere! She never minded waiting while I ran an errand and would be watching for me as I returned:) We never did get to take a long trip:(  We did have 5 overnights. A single and 2 doubles. She loved it. The bed in the van is narrow (34″) so she would go to sleep up by my head & shoulders and then when daylight appeared move down by my feet so she could watch (read GUARD) out the window! I would wake up with her head resting on my calf and her eyes watching out the window.


Next –  Pictures from our FIRST day together – after signing the adoption papers on April 20th – this year.

An all too short but PERFECT love affair!

Peaches  Peaches

Peaches  Peaches

Peaches  Peaches

Now, Peaches’ Chair is empty and My Heart Aches. 

I haven’t figured out why Peaches was SO SPECIAL. I have loved and deeply mourned all my Canine Kids! There was something different about Peaches.  She was a BIG DOG in a small body:) People thought her bark was a big dog bark when they couldn’t see her and commented on her bark when they could:) The vet said her cancer was seldom seen in small dogs – Peaches had BIG Dog cancer!

In time, I will open my heart, home and life to another Senior Canine that needs loving care for whatever time she has left. Probably in the Spring unless my path crosses with the right canine before that.

I know Peaches would want another to enjoy the life and benefits she had for her final 7 months and 1 day!

Peaches Empty Chair



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